These lines from the show make me wish I wrote them:
• Ken: "I always say, girl plus car equals dead animal."
• Nick: "Wow, that dinner smells good. Let me guess...meat?"
• Neal: "I'm Jewish. That's no cakewalk either. Last year, I was elected school treasurer. I didn't even run."
• Kim: "Are you calling me irrational? Because I'll tear your head off, Daniel. I'll tear it off and throw it over that fence."
• Bill: "I don't like jokes. I don't think they are funny."
and my favorite...
• Rosso: "I. Have. Herpes. It doesn't hurt that much, but believe me, you don't want it."
• Lindsay: "Can I please go now?"
• Rosso: "I just blew your mind, didn't I?"
Judd Apatow, I think you're better on television when you can't just rely on penis jokes. Freaks and Geeks has that signature Apatowian sweetness without all the genitalia.